What to Do When Things Don't Go Your Way

by Alexandra Copeland

There are two books in the Bible that are named after women, “The Book of Ruth” and “The Book of Esther”. The Book of Ruth tells us about Ruth, as well as Naomi, her mother-in-law. Naomi was the wife of Elimelech and mother of two sons, Mahlon and Chilion. During the biblical period in which they lived, there was a famine in Canaan, Elimelech and Naomi’s homeland. So Elimelech moved his family, Naomi and the boys, to Moab. None of us can knock Elimelech too much for what he did. He was trying to provide for his family. His own land, known as the land of milk and honey, had turned to the land of lack, so he moved his family with thoughts of it being only a temporary fix. But here’s the thing about Elimelech’s move, he went to a new place and forgot to unpack the virtues and statues that had always preserved him. This is often what we do. We forget that ‘new and shiny’ doesn’t always mean that its better than ‘tried and true’. 

Elimelech died after the move and left Naomi with two sons. To say that things were tough for a widow living during this time is an understatement. Respectable women were not allowed to work. If they did, they’d be considered outcasts and were labeled as prostitutes. Widows relied on the kindness of others, as it was customary for communities to be dutiful to care for them. Even though she was widowed, Naomi was looked upon as blessed while her sons were alive, because the culture was such that sons would grow up and make provisions for their widowed mothers. But after they married two Moabites women, Ruth and Orpah, Naomi’s sons died as well. She thought her life was over.

Check in with Heavenly Father  
Many people think that if they simply move to a different place, things will be different. Sometimes they are, and sometimes they aren’t. One of the major reasons why things are not different when a person moves to another location is because they’ve simply lugged the same baggage from one place to another. Sure, the external has changed, but the internal is still the same. Anyone who knows anything about God’s Word understands that change begins internally first. Proverbs 23:7 says the way that a person thinks in his or her heart determines who he or she will be. Proverbs 4:23 tells us to guard our hearts, to be diligent about what comes into them and what goes out of them, because the issues of life spring forth from our hearts. If we’ve got internal thoughts and attitudes that work against us in one area, they’ll do the same everywhere we go.

Famine is bad news for sure. It is today, and it was even worse during earlier biblical times, but the lesson for God’s people is to trust Him regardless of how circumstances and conditions appear. Many people stayed in Canaan during the famine, and God took care of them even though things were challenging. Heavenly Father instructs us in His Word to stand firm on His promises. So, before we make a move, we need to check in with Heavenly Father first. We need to pray for His guidance and direction and not take matters into our own hands.

Secondly, we must remember the wisdom of Proverbs 19:21(NLT). It says, “You can make many plans, but the LORD's purpose will prevail.” Getting in line with the program God has purposed for our lives is key. It will require us to examine our own thoughts and motives under the lens of His Word. He is not forgetful, and nothing slips by Him. If we have humbled ourselves before Him, He will confirm how and when we should take steps. God’s purpose must be the central focus of our lives, because His purpose is forever and always about sharing His love. He created us and wove His purpose into our being. The further we get away from this truth, the more unhappy in life we’ll be. We cannot expect to prosper when we go out of our way to neglect and ignore our duty to Heavenly Father through the Lord Jesus Christ.

Look for the lesson
God had given specific instructions that would’ve kept Elimelech and his family safe wherever they went, but they didn’t follow those instructions. So often we think we know best, and when you open the door to this kind of arrogance, destruction and disappointment will chase you down; you won’t be able to outrun it. The truth is that we make mistakes, and sometimes we make a move without God’s stamp of approval. We then find ourselves in a predicament where things just aren’t going our way. We shouldn’t panic but recognize it’s an opportune time to look for the lesson every hard knock teaches. When Naomi lost her husband, it may not have immediately dawned on her that Elimelech had made a bad move. But when her sons died, it became increasingly clear that her confidence had been misplaced. Both she and Elimelech had forgotten the ways of the Lord, but harmony was restored as she returned to them.

God alone is our anchor, and only He has the power to comfort and restore. 1 Peter 5:7 tells us to cast all our cares and worries on Him, because He cares about us. He is concerned about every detail of our existence. God tells us to abstain from certain things not because He wants to make our pleasure in life less, but because He wants to preserve our lives and keep us safe. Psalm 121:3 tells us that He will keep our feet from falling. He alone will guide our steps through the Spirit of Jesus Christ. Life is bound to present challenges and situations when things don’t go our way. Our response should be to check in with Heavenly Father pronto, to look for the lesson our wrong steps will teach, and to be patient as He redirects us through the leadership and guidance of the Holy Spirit. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.